The boxer has been in a fight many times. His face is lumpy where the bones have been broken. His nose is crooked. There are small scars all over his face where blows have split the skin.
But the boxer is unbeaten. Many blows have been landed on him, but none of them was the knockout punch. The boxer is durable, resilient. He’s been winded, wounded, and on the ropes, but has always found enough energy to get back in the fight. He knows he’s only got to hang on till the bell, and there’ll be a break. Sometimes he’s only won on points, but the win still counts.
You are the boxer.
Your mission field has thrown everything it’s got at you and you’re still standing. But each blow leaves its mark. Your bruises have bruises. The scar tissue is building up. You are tired, desperately tired, but you know you’ve only got to hang on a little bit longer and you’ll get that break. The holiday, the retreat, the home assignment is not that far away.
But all of a sudden the rules have changed and the bell is not ringing. The holiday has been cancelled. The retreat centre is closed. Home assignment is deferred due to travel restrictions. Some of us have had to leave our field of service for health reasons. Others have found themself stuck in the UK and are unable to return home. Some short-term workers have had their once-in-a-life-time gap year truncated, or their overseas medical elective cancelled (see last week’s blog).
For worn-out mission workers, most challenges and disappointments are not a knockout punch. We’ve been rolling with those hits for years. That’s why we value resilience, because we know the hits are big, but we can weather them.
Covid-19 may not in itself be a knockout punch, but it might be the straw that breaks the camel’s back. It’s a low, cunning, unexpected hit, but what’s even worse is that it comes just when we thought we could make it to the bell. One top of all the other blows that come again and again, our resources are drained and our resilience tested.
And now, all of a sudden, we have to find a new way to do ministry. We have to homeschool our kids. We are home alone and can’t meet with our friends, or we’re stuck in the house and have to face the tensions in our marriage. We are concerned about getting the right resources, finding the right balance between loving and leaving. We wonder if we made the right decision: should we have stayed in the field? We feel guilty because we have the freedom to choose when those we work with don’t. We carry the grief of friends and family who have died and we haven’t been able to be at the funeral. And although others are suffering too it’s different for us, and nobody else understands, but we can’t tell them that for fear of appearing elitist.
Syzygy loves the bell at the end of the round, because we know every mission worker needs time out to refresh, take stock, ask some deep questions and re-envision for the future. It’s those short breaks that restore our strength to get through the fight. So we’re changing the rules back, and ringing the bell anyway. You may be stuck in the UK but you can still have a retreat.
Together with Global Connections, we’re running an online retreat for mission workers who are stuck away from their place of calling, struggling to keep their ministry going. It’s an opportunity to connect with God for three hours on 14th May, and reflect on what’s been happening. Find out more by visiting the Global Connections website.
We hope you can join us.
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